Shall we dance?
# way-beyond-work: this was the title of the email I sent to the team on the last day I "was with them" (contractually speaking and also in the channels and working platforms that helped us so much in the last months). From that day on, my presence in each of their lives and theirs in mine would officially remain beyond work, above all.
This is what had been planned for a long time and by the time this move was talked about, it was no longer a surprise to anyone. Everyone knew that my move was coming soon since the end of the year 2018. My time to make my decision clear (to myself) was less brief, it took a year. It was one of the hardest decisions I have made to date.
After all, who chooses to leave a place that feels like home, a safe haven?
A team that is family? - Where you talk, discuss, hug, laugh, work, care, cry, and are close to support and celebrate the moments of the life of each one (without the famous boundaries between what is personal and professional) and of the company, in the same measure that you respect the life of each person and the boundaries that each one sets.
A project in which you believe? - Where everyone has the freedom to build, to add, to do differently, to create, to question, to make mistakes, to experiment. Where each client, partner or team member is allowed the space and time to discover and transform themselves as much as they are able and willing.
Who chooses to leave still taking into account the fact that they are in a "safe", "comfortable" situation (whatever that means in the life of each one of you)?
Many would say "how crazy!", "how inconsequential!" or something similar. The reaction of this team was quite different (of course!): "finally!" said some, "how nice, I'm so happy for you!" said others, and they added "I'm sorry you're leaving but I know you'll be happier!", "I wish you could stay" or "it's going to cost me so much not having you here every day". And no, it wasn't for show, it was heartfelt. They knew I needed that space, for other things of mine that didn't fit in the scope of the Way Beyond project, and also because they always chose not to clip "those wings" (neither me nor anyone else).
In the 3 years and peaks in which I proudly belonged to this team (and that seemed many more - confirm in Joana's article that the notion of time is lived, felt, in a different way), I explored several other areas. Guided by my curiosity, I spread my wings to other flights and I always shared with the team the discoveries, conquests, learning (and some I integrated within the WB project). Everyone in the team is different but equal in that they need to explore, study and deepen their different interests. And this stimulates each one, without the need to "spur" or encourage anyone to do it, because it is enough to give space, time, listening, body and mind present.
So it was no surprise, they did not try to "hold me back" or negotiate my decision as so many companies would seek (to keep the rate at its lowest) forgetting that holding back is different from the deliberate choice to stay (for me, the true indicator of motivation).
It was not, at the end of 2019, planned that I would join the partner team (taking into account my "flights"). We planned (and I write in the third person plural because they were plans made together, taking into account what each party needed and what made sense) my departure and how the times would be until then: dates, projects, priorities, needs from part to part, etc.
And then a virus went around the world and changed the plans. It changed or my flight plans. It changed the plans of the team, the clients, the partners. And with that changed everyone's priorities, dates and needs. We talked. Me and my buttons. They and their buttons. Then we all talked, honestly, without half-words or messages between the lines. My flights would no longer take me far away (geographically) but still asked for space and time. We would also all like to continue to dedicate some time to #work, making the best of each part, of the moment we are going through and of this flexibility that was "asked" of us. Simple? Yes, it was. It wouldn't be in other companies (I don't suppose, I assert) but in this one it was. I knew it would be. I didn't know how much simpler it would be when I imagined, visualised, the first conversation about the subject and the whole process until it came true, in my head.
Today I am a Partner and Friend of Way Beyond (in my signature on the current email). I didn't ask to be, nor was I asked to be. We validated if this is how we wanted to be. Until when we both want it to be or whenever we both want it to be. I dreaded the change. I told myself it wasn't an exit, it was a change of format, as if one thing wasn't the other, as if the exit (of a format) wasn't in itself a change. Words have power, they create our reality, I learned there. And I also learned to accept that transforming and creating power of new realities. It was an exit, the end of a way of collaborating. It was also the beginning of another way of being, of working, of living this new period. We don't know what other changes (endings and beginnings) will come, even the ones we plan (we have already seen that we control little in this life) but if we know how to keep talking about how each one wants to be in each moment, the dance will be done without stepping on each other's toes or running over each other.
And keep dancing! I'm grateful to have you as a pair.
